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Trump

08 Jul 2018

Daddy Issues

Haiku: 

Ivanka's her name,

But she's Viagra to me.

Just a lot cheaper.

07 Jul 2018

Penis

Haiku: 

One of Trump's old tricks.

If you hold it with both hands,

It looks much bigger.

05 Jul 2018

Old Glory Hole

Haiku: 

Five minutes later,

The stars and stripes are sticky,

And the pole has crabs.

15 May 2018

Tickle #Metoo Elmo

Haiku: 

If Elmo had tits,

Would tickling him be assault?

And would it stop me?

10 May 2018

Shit Show

Haiku: 

Look at that moron.

So much shit spews from his mouth,

It needs a diaper.

06 May 2018

Dreamsicle

Haiku: 

That awkward moment,

When Donald Trump is impeached,

But you're still sucking.

28 Apr 2018

Blue Period

Haiku: 

I'm a work of art.

Like Monica Lewinsky,

Drawn by Picasso.

26 Apr 2018

Peezus

Haiku: 

That awkward moment,

When you expect R. Kelly,

And Kanye shows up.

25 Apr 2018

Milk Milk Lemonade

Haiku: 

She won't hold my hand.

She's been playing Lemonade.

Goddamn Beyonce!

21 Apr 2018

Note to Self

Haiku: 

When this is over,

Rent a room at Trump Tower,

And piss everywhere.

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