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07 Jul 2018

Penis

Haiku: 

One of Trump's old tricks.

If you hold it with both hands,

It looks much bigger.

05 Jul 2018

Old Glory Hole

Haiku: 

Five minutes later,

The stars and stripes are sticky,

And the pole has crabs.

11 Jun 2018

Oh Canada!

It just isn't fair.

Canada gets his fine ass,

And we get an ass.

15 May 2018

Tickle #Metoo Elmo

Haiku: 

If Elmo had tits,

Would tickling him be assault?

And would it stop me?

10 May 2018

Shit Show

Haiku: 

Look at that moron.

So much shit spews from his mouth,

It needs a diaper.

06 May 2018

Dreamsicle

Haiku: 

That awkward moment,

When Donald Trump is impeached,

But you're still sucking.

28 Apr 2018

Blue Period

Haiku: 

I'm a work of art.

Like Monica Lewinsky,

Drawn by Picasso.

26 Apr 2018

Peezus

Haiku: 

That awkward moment,

When you expect R. Kelly,

And Kanye shows up.

25 Apr 2018

Milk Milk Lemonade

Haiku: 

She won't hold my hand.

She's been playing Lemonade.

Goddamn Beyonce!

21 Apr 2018

Note to Self

Haiku: 

When this is over,

Rent a room at Trump Tower,

And piss everywhere.

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