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Rice

21 Aug 2008

Hand Jive

Haiku: 

Laura's new rule:

Our hands must be visible

when we're together. 

18 Aug 2008

Crisis

Haiku: 

Attention Russia!

Don't fuck up my vacation!

Really, don't be dicks. 

10 Jun 2008

Nose Job

Haiku: 

I'm like a girl scout.

I got my first merit badge.

It's for brown nosing. 

27 Feb 2008

Finish Line

Haiku: 

Just a few more months

and I'll be spilling my guts

on the Tyra show. 

24 Jan 2008

Nose Job

Haiku: 

It's called "Got your nose."

I played it once with Laura

and hers came right off.  

16 Dec 2007

Rice Pudding

Haiku: 

You screw one dumbass

and every horny retard

thinks he has a chance.

20 Nov 2007

Confession

Haiku: 


It's a vibrator,

not a goddamn pogo stick.

Stop it, you'll go blind.  

 
20 Nov 2007

Project Runway

Haiku: 

Get her out of here

before she cuts up the drapes

for another suit.  

28 Sep 2007

Hatchback

Haiku: 

Condi's just my type,

built like a twelve year old boy

with a vagina. 

 
29 Aug 2007

Spin Doctor

Haiku: 

Oh, she looks fine now!

But just a minute ago

her head spun around.  

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